The Day Beer Became Legal In St. Louis.

Sunday’s Budweiser commercial about the end of Prohibition reminded me of my dad’s stories about the day legal beer arrived in his neighborhood. This is especially pertinent since he grew up in Budweiser’s hometown of St. Louis, on Roosevelt Place, in a neighborhood called Wells-Goodfellow today. Dad was 13 when Prohibition ended in December, 1933.

The commercial cheats history slightly, because legally-made and sold Budweiser actually arrived in St. Louis taverns shortly after Franklin Roosevelt took office in March, 1933, as dad explains below. The term ‘legal beer’ is used here because beer itself never left the neighborhood. Here’s how dad remembered it:

"Gelhausen was the local bootlegger who also had a saloon down on Clara Avenue. There was a wire leading from their house out to the garage. In the center of the yard there was a light bulb hanging from the wire. Sometimes at night, we would see the light flashing on and off -- like Morse Code. Sometimes this was followed by a car in the alley, pulling up to the garage. We never went to investigate.

"The Meyers family lived up near Goodfellow Blvd. Mr. Meyers was the acknowledged best home brew maker in the neighborhood, if not the civilized world. He undoubtedly applied the same skill and attention to detail as he did in his job as a tool and die maker. His stuff was far superior to the stuff that we occasionally made in our basement.

"It was no more illegal for kids to drink heingemake (homebrew) than for adults, so we were allowed to join in the responsible and moderate use of the quaff. At the Meyers' house, as was common, the beer was bottled in one-fifth gallon bottles and served in an aluminum bucket, from which all partook.

"Frank Meyers' system was a seven day process that he would tend to right after work. He would come in the back door, put his lunch bucket on the sink, kiss his wife, then go to the basement for that day's part in the process. After FDR took office, an executive order was issued proclaiming that 3.2% beer was not intoxicating, therefore it did not fall under the restrictions in the 18th amendment. A date was set when this would take effect.

"The building at the corner of Clara and Roosevelt (named for Teddy, I might add) was owned by Anheuser-Busch and had been a tavern. It was now Wesling's grocery. Gelhausen's Saloon across the street had never closed. Perhaps they served iced tea and soda pop during the great drought. The lease for Busch's building had a clause that if beer ever became legal again the lease could be terminated.

"An agreement was reached and an addition was built onto the rear of the grocery and made into a tavern. You may note that I refer to one establishment as a tavern and the other as a saloon. This is not accidental. Gelhausen's was a dark, bad place with men sitting around. I do not know why, when beer was again legal, that Grandma always had me go to Gelhausen's when she wanted a pitcher of beer. There was a side door at the rear and a separate tap for take-out. It cost a whole dime for a big pitcher of beer.

"When 'B' day was drawing near, Mr. Meyers finished up the current batch and started to dismantle and pack away his equipment. When the fateful day arrived (as I remember it, it was April 12, 1933), most of the men in the neighborhood congregated at Wesling's Tavern. The house was packed and everyone was having a riotous good time. When Frank Meyers walked in a hush fell over the place and the crowd around the bar parted like the Red Sea to make room for the greatest. He walked up to the bar, Mr. Wesling drew a glass and set it in front of him. He took a sip, then another sip, then pushed the glass away and turned and walked out. It was not the same after that, it was quiet and half the customers left. Obviously, I was not there but my Uncle Russ was and told me about it.

"Mr. Meyers went straight home, straight to the basement, unpacked his equipment and started a new batch. Mrs. Meyers kidded later that it was the first time in their forty years of marriage that he had come into the house and started working without kissing her first.

"In fairness to Anheuser-Busch, I should add that they were limited to 3.2% alcohol while the Meyers brew ran close to the theoretical maximum for the fermentation process, around 12%."

Mistruth In Alcoholic Beverage Marketing.

Mistruth, if it’s even a word, is an interesting one.

You won’t find it at Merriam-Webster Online. It’s not in Webster’s Third New International Dictionary (Unabridged) either. MS Word is okay with it but Blogger's spell checker is not.

Scrabblefinder and similar sources say it is a legitimate Scrabble word, but they don’t provide a definition for it. Lexic.us defines it as “a lie” and offers examples of its use dating back to 1823. Wiktionary defines it as “untruth, falsehood.” You can find many examples of its use and, from context, that is how most writers seem to mean it, as synonymous with lie.

Only Urban Dictionary defines it differently, as “a statement that is true yet misleading.” They give as an example of its use, “Our web site is dedicated to dispel the mistruths propagated in their campaign.” That’s a pretty lousy sentence and it could easily be taken either way.

Still, we need a word like mistruth, the way Urban Dictionary defines it. Statements that are technically true but misleading are mainstays of political rhetoric and all forms of marketing, for whiskey and pretty much everything else. Marketers can be punished for untruths but mistruths (again, as Urban Dictionary defines them) get a lot more slack.

Advertising regulation in the USA, such as it is, is done nationally by the Federal Trade Commission (FTC). As a practical matter, someone has to complain before the FTC will investigate and act. The law says advertising must be truthful and non-deceptive; advertisers must have evidence to back up their claims; and advertisements cannot be unfair.

Usually it is competitors who bring the complaints.

Advertisers do not have to submit their advertising for review and approval. Enforcement is strictly after-the-fact. FTC actions usually result in the marketer voluntarily changing the offending message. The FTC can impose penalties if marketers refuse to abide by its findings.

The FTC is very lax about enforcing its own rules. One of the best examples is the word ‘free.’ It is supposed to mean “devoid of cost or obligation,” but you constantly see it used (with impunity) to mean “included at no extra cost with purchase.”

When this column takes a whiskey producer to task it’s usually over a mistruth, not a clear untruth. Whiskey marketers usually won’t lie outright, but they can be misleading as hell. Everybody does it, large and small, distillers and non-distiller producers.

Alcoholic beverage marketers have to clear a higher hurdle than most marketers. They have to submit all product labels for approval by the Tax and Trade Bureau (TTB), which is part of the Treasury Department. The ‘label’ is everything attached to or printed on the container (i.e., bottle, can, wine box). Alcoholic beverage marketers do not have to submit other marketing materials for approval, such as advertising, just the labels.

Alcoholic beverage marketers, both large and small, complain that TTB is inconsistent, even capricious. The big guys usually have the resources to work the system until they get a favorable outcome. The little guys usually don’t.

It would be a shame if TTB’s reputation declines to a point where people can’t trust the labels. That will be a victory for mistruth.

Children Welcome!

Most alcohol-related sites on the web have an age gate. It's all honor system, but you must at least claim you are of legal drinking age to get in.

There's a good reason for this. The purpose of those sites is to persuade visitors to buy a certain alcohol product. All alcohol producers pledge not to market their products to underage persons, and contrary to the calumnies of the Neo-Prohibitionists, the vast majority of alcohol producers honor that pledge in good faith. Hence the age gates.

Some booze bloggers also label their sites 'for adults only.' That's their prerogative, but The Chuck Cowdery Blog has a different attitude.

You may be too young to drink alcoholic beverages but you're never to young to learn.

What you read here will be factual, honest, and suitable for persons of all ages. Childhood is not a permanent condition and most of it is spent preparing for adulthood. If you are underage, it is for many reasons in your best interest to obey the law, but by all means drink deeply of the cup of knowledge, and do so early and often.

Young people should be encouraged to eschew alcohol until they reach legal drinking age, but you won't accomplish that by pretending alcohol doesn't exist. If all they get is the ham-handed and dishonest anti-alcohol messages contained in most youth alcohol awareness programs, that alone may drive them prematurely to imbibe.

So don't drink, kids. And say no to drugs. And you might want to watch your caffeine and sugar intake too. But by all means, read.

And if this post, and especially the picture, infuriates some Neo-Prohibitionists, that's a bonus.

Keep Vulgarity In Its Place.

I like vulgarity as much as the next guy, but I'm glad it's not everywhere and I would prefer that it stay out of advertising. Vulgarity has power because it's transgressive, anti-establishment, risky. Nothing sucks the juice out of expression or imagery faster than advertising. Plus advertising is plenty vulgar enough already.

I say this as someone who has worked in advertising for 40 years.

Put the middle finger salute in advertising and pretty soon it will be on the Disney channel. 

So that's why I would just as soon that neither Wild Turkey nor Old Crow give me the bird.

For one thing, it's not that funny.

Sort of like Effen Vodka.

Another Unintentionally Gay Whiskey Ad from 1966.

My friend Josh found this book of old whiskey ads from 1966 and it keeps yielding up gems like the one above and this one I posted back in March. What can I say? It speaks for itself.

Partners In Pleasure.

My friend Josh recently found a publication from 1966 that contains a lot of ads aimed at the liquor trade. This one has me scratching my head. Or, perhaps, rubbing my chin quizzically like the guy in the lower right hand corner. (Click on it for a larger version.)

Jimmy Russell, Rock Star.

Bruce Schreiner does a good job covering the American whiskey business for AP. His article today describes how the master distillers of American whiskey have become like rock stars on the international circuit of whiskey festivals and other events. As usual with an AP story, you can find it on the web in about 5,000 places, but one of them is here.

The Wrong Way to Promote a Bar.

About 25 years ago, before most of the patrons of Uncle Fatty’s Rum Resort (2833 N. Sheffield Ave., Chicago) were born, activists such as Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD) began to raise awareness about the innocent victims of alcohol abuse. Laws were changed to stiffen penalties and improve enforcement. Minds were changed too. Fear of arrest and loss of their driver’s license was the sole motivation for some, but others had their consciousness raised.

Today, some of the activists have gone too far, veering into neo-Prohibitionism, but much of what they did was long overdue and beneficial. The problem hasn’t gone away, but attitudes now are much different than they were back then.

Among those who changed were the purveyors of alcoholic beverages. Some of it was forced on them, but not all. Many common promotion practices were toned down voluntarily.

The new paradigm was to promote in ways that did not encourage over-consumption of alcohol. Rather than promoting Happy Hour with two-for-one drinks, it was promoted with free nachos. Promote fun, not alcohol, the thinking went, and recognize that people rarely need their arms twisted to drink.

What’s more, whenever alcohol purveyors (whether they be producers or retailers) compete on the basis of who can put the most alcohol into the greatest number of people for the lowest price, everybody loses. (e.g., nickel beer night.)

The distinction can be subtle, but there are ways to give consumers an incentive to spend money on your product or at your place without encouraging them to drink too much.

Even outside the world of alcohol, promotions that seem to urge consumers to engage in unhealthy activities have become unfashionable. “All you can eat” fish fries are now “all you care to eat.” The problem, people realized, wasn’t the fixed-price nature of the offer, it was the implied challenge, the dare. “All you can eat” is interpreted by too many people as “how much can you eat, anyway?” They rationalize that the only way to “get their money’s worth” is to stuff themselves sick.

Alcohol, of course, ups the ante.

So I was surprised to read about Uncle Fatty’s “World’s Largest Indoor Bar Crawl,” from 6 PM to 9 PM on Saturday, August 1, “featuring five separate bars each serving specialty drinks in a combined space that spans 8,000 square-feet. The cost is $30 per person for the three hour all-you-can drink package.”

There are those dreaded words, in the bar’s official press release, “all-you-can drink.” (There seems to be a hyphen missing, but that’s the least of it.)

I’m sure Uncle Fatty’s will say they do not encourage overconsumption, so why use that loaded phrase? It just seems to be asking for trouble.

Then there’s this: “All of ‘The World’s Largest Indoor Bar Crawl’ participants will be given a punch card. If they successfully get a drink from each of the five bars, they will receive a FREE ‘Cooler Service’ -- 12 domestic beers served in an iced-down cooler -- on their next visit.”

‘Cooler Service’ is a clever, downscale variation on the ‘bottle service’ offered by high end night clubs, which has been criticized because it makes it harder to monitor each patron’s consumption, which establishments that serve alcohol are legally required to do.

The simplest statement of an alcohol seller’s legal obligation is, “don’t sell alcohol to someone who is drunk.” If you do, the penalties can be severe. Bartenders, servers, even liquor store cashiers, receive special training to make sure they understand this law and their obligations under it.

Nothing about Uncle Fatty’s “World’s Largest Indoor Bar Crawl” appears to be illegal, just the opposite. It crosses a line regarding what is ultimately enlightened self-interest. Make the patrons collect a trinket from the bartender at each bar, and give them a T-shirt instead of more beer. “Drinks included” says what you need to say without the provocation of “all-you-can-drink.” Make it about saving money and having fun. There is no danger that anyone will forget there is alcohol available.

What Clients Are Really Like, Really.

I have worked in advertising/marketing/corporate communications for about 35 years. This is what it's like, really. This video is widely posted on the web, but I can't find a source for it. The only actor I recognize is Al Samuel, who plays Al Click on the syndicated comedy show, "Sports Action Team." He plays the male client representative. Although I think he's a Chicago guy, that's all I know and there my search ends. Enjoy the video.